Strange Nonsensical Fiction

"The koko will give you bad dreams if you don't keep quiet"

This was a situation which I observed a parent trying to silence their kid. I do not know how that would actually make the kid silent unless they just came out of a horror movie. But it is situation like this where it would leave a lasting impression.

While it might make the kid quiet, he might inadvertently have a fear for older brothers thinking that bad dreams can enter their sleep if they misbehaved.

I remember when I was young, I was told that if I pointed to the moon I will wake up with scars. While there were times it happened, and we all know it is definitely not due to the moon, but why would someone say such things? It is a very strange way to silence someone who at that age is the age of exploration and understanding. While thankfully I did not have a fear of the moon but somehow this event keeps replaying in me and whenever I come across a parent trying to silence their kids with ridiculous statements I just feel like telling them that the kid might actually remember that for life.

While there may be times when it may be too difficult to answer a kids pestering of questions or misbehavings, I still honestly think that a truthful remark or statement is better than nonsensical fiction that may hamper a kid's growth.

And I Come Running Back to You

While I ponder what to write on this blog, do enjoy the music on the video above. :)

Basically, it has been a really long time since I wrote a post or even browse to this page. If I remember correctly, it was set up as part of a hype of having a blog. Now that it is mostly dead, with people using FB and Twitter, there really is no need for a blog. But then again, this tool still provides huge loads more content compare to other mentioned services. There is no character limit and no limit to what you want to put on the blog. The only limit is what to put on the blog.

So, you may ask, what is with the blog title? Well, apart from it being a snippet of the song DJ Shah - Back To You (as attached), it just signifies that I will try to return to blogging.

For now, it will just be a placeholder for upcoming posts.

Merry Christmas 2008

Well, 2008 is coming to an end and it seems that I'm still alive! I've been absent for a while in updating this blog so much so that the tag-board is spammed till I have to delete all the posts. Since I've been inactive for quite some time, I will hence put down some of the questions you will probably ask.

• What have I been doing?
  Well, I've been busy pretty much with work. Been going back around 8+ lately fixing up issues after issues in my workplace. As for entertainment side, I had the priviledge of watching Heroes and Top Gear S12 for the past few weeks but since Heroes is on a break, I guess I finally found some time to update this.
  


• What did I do for Christmas?
  I slept past the church morning Christmas celebration as I had a late night playing computer. I only woke up at about 12+ to have my lunch and then went to Sheraton Imperial in KL with my family as they had a free stay there. After watching Vantage Point with my parents, we headed for a buffet dinner at the hotel. I came home after that while my parents continued staying there as I had work tomorrow.
  


• How have I been?
  I'm pretty OK. Although work is tiring at times, it is expected and with the current economic situation, it is best to continue to perform my best to avoid being last and getting fired (if it happens). I bought myself a new computer not too long ago which enabled me to play the hottest latest games around without any frills. This also contributed in my lack of posting in this blog.
  


• Any new hobbies / interests?
  Other than my growing interests for tech / gadget stuff, the new thing which I might pick up next is cycling. Several colleagues have pursuaded me to pick it back up and although my first attempt did not go too well, it's nevertheless something which I could see myself do in the future. I am now contemplating in acquiring a bike to further the interest/hobby.
  


• First Attempt? Didn't go too well?
  Last weekend, I attended the Putrajaya Critical Mass cycling event thingy with 2 of my colleagues. Seeing that I had no bike or helmet, I hastily borrowed them from my friends. As I mentally prepared myself for the event, in my mind I thought it will be easy with little uphill and just go for the 20+KM route. Funny thing is that I forgot to take into account that 20+KM is a very long distance and hence did not fully prepare for it. My water supply was limited and my energy consumption was a little too high at the start. At about 6-8KM in the route, I found myself extremely tired and exhausted. I pushed a little further to continue but eventually my muscles cried out and then refused to move.
  
  I parked the bike at the side and then immediately had a cram on both my calves and was then no longer able to continue. The support cars and everyone else was too far ahead and was not able to return to get me. My colleague continued on to try to get to the car fast and then come and get me. It took about 30 minutes for them to reach their car and another 30 minutes to find me somewhere in the middle of Putrajaya. Being stuck in the middle of the highway with no landmarks, unable to walk and a almost dead phone battery was quite scary. In all I waited for about 1 hour before they found me on the opposite side of the road.
  
  The experience was definitely unpleasant as every slow moving motorbike looks like a snatch theif or something. But for some funny reason, I found myself passing the time somewhat quickly by playing with a ant nest I found nearby. I spent minutes just staring at the ants moving back and forth on the ground and occasionally place obstacles like rocks and sand on their path to see how they recover or unburrow themselves.
  
  Eventually I was rescued and I was unable to walk normally till about 2 days after where the pain finally eases and I was able to walk up and down the stairs easily. Despite the setback, I think I will continue to attend that monthly event and continue to train myself to be able to complete the event and take the wonderful pictures around Putrajaya.
  


• Am I seeing someone?
  If you mean by girlfriend, the answer is no. There may be a few interests but we'll see how it goes. Am not actively pursuing but rather taking a normal steady approach and see how it unravels. If it is meant to be, so much the better. If not, at least I'm not head over heels yet. One thing for sure, i'll keep my vulnerability in check constantly taking a 3rd person view of things to make sure that I don't do anything stupid that could potentially ruin anything/everything.
  

Malaysian International Fireworks Competition 2008

As the title suggests, I was priviledged to attend the event twice. Once on 24th (Team Spain) and another on the 29th (Team Australia). It was my first attempt at taking fireworks with my compact so I thought maybe I could learn a little before moving on to a D-SLR. I borrowed a tripod and head off to the event. It was quite embarassing when I arrived there because every tripod had a DSLR attached to it and I have a small compact on it. I was actually surprised when I looked at the pictures taken cause the pictures actually turned out pretty well.

Team Spain

Team Australia (Finale)

In conclusion, the sight of countless fireworks going off one bye one is just simply breathtaking. There is no way of saying it except that it's an event one should not miss. I'll surely look forward to next year's event and hopefully it will be better than this year.

No I didn't die in KK

Haha! It's been so long since I last blogged. You guys might have thought that I have died in KK. Haha! Well I didn't but was kind of close to it when I succumbed to the cold and failed to reach the peak! GAGH!

But nevertheless, I attempted and reached the height of 3668m out of 4095m. It was quite a view even from up there. And when you're back down, you just cannot believe that you were up there less than 24 hours ago. Anyway, below are some of the pictures of the climb.

This is near the beginning where everyone is still OK

The road is long and steep

Top of the world

Actually, I think it is not that hard to reach the summit. The key points are, practice and exercise before the event and equipment. For me, I had neither as my head lamp decided to fail the minute before the climb. Left without a light, I had to follow other people's pace and hence had to use more energy to climb blindly and not knowing which step has the least inclination. I only had 4 practices prior to engaging Mount Kinabalu and that too I think is a contributing factor to my downfall. In addition to that, the coldness actually got a hold of me and broke me. I succumbed to the cold wind of 2-3 degrees celcius and after trying to hold it, my body gave up and at then, the battle is over. All I wanted was to head down and sleep.

But after thinking through it over and over and over again, I think it is possible to reach the summit if I've taken the proper steps and if everything goes to plan. I would like to attempt it again if given the opportunity and would definitely try my best to make it to the top. Do contact me, if you're going in the near future.

A tough challenge ahead

About a month ago, I made a decision which would very much stretch me to the limit in every way. The following picture will help show you what the challenge is.

That's right guys! I'm going to climb Mount Kinabalu. The problem is that for an unfit guy to climb up, they normally require an intensive training of at least 3 months to be fully trained before going up. I only have 4 weeks and only the weekends to prepare. Is it enough? I sure hope so but initial trainings has proved that I have a problem with dehydration, low stamina and quite heavy to pull my own weight up.

Over the course of 2 weeks, I've been training at Bukit Jalil Park for the staircases, Pak San / Bukit Wangsa / Bukit Puteh for the trail hikes and Bukit Kiara for building up my stamina and cardiovascular systems. I'm supposed to go to Batu Caves today, but due to an unforseen circumstances in work, I have to come to office to work in the morning thus ceasing a chance to train myself.

I hope I'll be able to make it all the way to the top and back in one piece. I'll try to get the pictures up here once I'm back. Till then, keep me in prayer and do join for my trainings if you would like to.

The idea of sharing...

It's a rather cheesy topic to talk about but a recent event prompted me to pen this down. Many of you all would know that I do not like to share my things. I like to have my own snacks, my own drinks, my own PC, gadgets and all. The only thing I seem to share is my collection of avi's. Anyway, to cut the long sotry short, I'd like to ask your opinion on sharing based on a scenario I've recently observed.

I recently visited a family whose parents had young children. The kid was playing his own toys all to himself. After a few minutes, another family came to visit. A kid of similar age joined in. The father of the first kid asked that he shared his toys with the new comer. He was a little upset as the other kid does not know what or how it's supposed to be played and end up throwing the toys just to hear and see how the toys react when its thrown. After a couple of times the new kid threw the toys, the parents stopped him and later went home after their visit.

The incident got me thinking. Why risk share something you have set up nicely to someone who don't know what you've been doing? Supposed it's a Lego and you've aseembled yourself an impressive object only to be thrown or torn into pieces? This also raises a question, why is it that when someone visits your place, you are asked to share your toys / PC / things with others? And why is it that when you visit someone's place, you are asked to allow the host to let you play? If i've let them play with my things, why can't I have straight access to other people's stuff too?

Am I to sacrifice the stuff I care to let others play and vandalize it? Am I to let other people take advantage over me? Supposed a really dominating person were to always take advantage of our kind offering to allow them to play something and we wait patiently for our turn but we never get it, what are we to do? Nothing? Are we to do anything to stop them from being like that? Do nice people always finish last by allowing others to domninate and take advantage of us?

Let me know.

2 Days of Freedom!

Whoa! I just got back from a really really cool weekend. I had the opportunity to go for a festival for 2 days in Port Dickson to witness Tiesto's Elements Of Life Tour in Malaysia! In addition, several other famous DJ's were there such as Ferry Corsten, Cosmic Gate and several other upcoming DJ's. They all played different music and styles with various displays and pyrotechnics which provided a very uplifting and energetic atmosphere.

However, for both nights, Tiesto only came out at about 12AM when we've all already used up most of our energy cheering, shouting and jumping for the earlier DJ's making us less energetic for Tiesto. It is such a shame that Tiesto didn't put up much of a performance on Friday due to some inconsiderate people shining bright lasers into his face and eyes while he's performing. Nevertheless, he still put on quite a show but it wasn't until Saturday night that it was the best! Below are some of the videos taken for the event. I bought a 4GB SDHC Card for my camera to enable me to record 90 minutes of the event. I was able to record about 70minutes before my battery gave way. Enjoy the following:

Cosmic Gate - Nebula + Everything (Freedom 08 EOL Tour)

Tiesto - 10 Seconds to Sunrise (Freedom 08 EOL Tour)

Tiesto - Break My Fall (Freedom 08 EOL Tour)

Tiesto - Elements Of Life (Freedom 08 EOL Tour)

He's a Pirate (Freedom 08 EOL Tour)

Tiesto - Adagio For Strings (Freedom 08 EOL Tour)

You will notice that I did not have any videos taken on the Friday night (9/5) as I thought cameras were not allowed in the concert hall. I only brought it in on Saturday for the recordings. I apologise for the poor video quality especially on the first Tiesto video (10 Seconds to Sunrise). This is due to the fact that i over zoom in and soomehow the camera was not set to focus on Tiesto but rather on the stage. For the other videos it's a little jerky as I was constantly shaken by people walking and pushing about their way to the front as well as me jumping or moving to the beat. Nevertheless, the audio is still pretty awesome!

I look forward to future occurance of such concerts and would gladly welcome other DJ's like Armin Van Buuren or DJ Shah or Aly and Fila to come and show their stuff and play their music. The choice I made to go to the concert is not a mistake and I hope that my videos will encourage and grow the community of trance fans.

ADND + Penang Trip + Stolen Wipers

Ok, I know I have a lot of catching up to do in updating you all on what have been happening to me. This post will be a photo blog where there will be lots of pictures to describe the events that happened over the past few weeks/months. Suffice to say, I have bought myself a new digital camera and I've been experimenting with various shots/angles to get really good quality images and hopefully if I have the interest, move on and get myself a DSLR. Anyway, without further delay, here are the pictures taken with my new Digital Ixus 80 IS.

Accenture Annual Dinner and Dance
Well, on 4th of April, my company had an annual dinner of which everyone has to dress up to the theme of the evening which was "Magic". Weeks prior to that, all of us had to scratch our heads to think of what kind of costume would we wear? I at first thought of going as a wizard but after hearing that the best dress costume actually wins a Wii, I asked my friend to help me dress up to win that. In the costume renting shop, he suggested a Witch Doctor / Shaman kinda of costume. And here is how it turned out.

Shyan and I

I end up not winning the Wii, but this "cupboard" did. OMG!

Sze Lyn and I

Other Accenturians in their magical costumes

Penang Trip
About a week ago, I went to Penang to celebrate my grandmother's birthday. I took an Air Asia jet there and it seems that Air Crash Investigations really scares the crap out of me when it comes to flying. I think I should stop watching it. Haha! Anyway, here are some captured moments.

Air Asia logo captured on the seat of the aircraft

A view from Equitorial Hotel in Penang

I thought this shadow looked interesting

I really like this shot taken in the hotel

There was a wedding fair in the hotel, and I thought this looked nice

My brother, my grandmother and me

My Wipers Got Stolen!
Yesterday, when I was going out for lunch, I noticed something was wrong with my car. To my horrow, the wipers were stolen! All 3 of them! Grrrr!! Took these shots when I was going back and as you figured, it was raining! Imagine driving under these conditions. Gosh!

I have to remind myself to not on the wipers else my windscreen would ...

Back wiper is missing too!

On a Valentine's Day

Valentine's Day has now just passed and you may ask "how did it go?" or perhaps "met anyone?". Well the answer is this. No, I did not spend it with anyone nor went out. I worked till 7 and then when I got home, I was so tired and just decided to stay at home. Initially I wanted to format one of my PC's but I end up playing some Tower Defense instead. How did yours went? Feel free to leave a comment below.

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I was just looking through some of the pictures taken from my phone last year and here are some selected few which didn't make it in my previous posts.

Perth City taken from King's Park

One of the parks in Perth. Sadly, we don't have such a neat park here in Malaysia

Perth City viewed from the park

Cloudy skies somewhere along NKVE

There is no denying that this building actually looks quite cool

Sun setting behind KLCC

Clouds around TPM

Wisps of clouds

My New Ride!

Yay!! It's arrived! Just in time before CNY! It arrived yesterday (Jan 30th). Sufficely to say, so far everything is working except that I haven't test out the CD player. Handling is surprisingly good although the car rolls a little too much on cornerings. It's still good and I would say an above average car.

Ever since the blog started till about a couple of months ago, every post has a proper story in it or something really valuable or thought provoking or something of which someone can write a comment on. However, lately I've not been having the many blog inspirations and hence am just unsure of what to write on this space.

I like to write a lot about my past, but I just keeping getting myself smacked in the face to tell me that I should no longer write about the past but instead look towards the future. Well, I can't write much about my future as I'm no Hiro and can't bend space and time :P

I hope that I'll be able to find interesting topics to pen down and attract more visitors soon. That's it for now, have a good day.

PS: Am still having slight coughs.

I'm sick...

Gosh... I've been sick since wednesday. Normally for any flu sickness I get, it starts from having sore throat on the first day, fever on the second, running nose on the third and cough after the sore throat is over. However this time, on wednesday morning, I woke up with all the symptoms (except the cough).

I felt like calling in sick and not go to work and stay at home to get some rest, but I have some stuff that needs to be done and I really need to get it done on Friday. So I went to work to try to complete as much as I can in my not-so-efficient state. In office, my running nose got worse and then i realised that its starting to come out of my nose. When I brought my finger to my nose to check if it's really coming out, to my horror, my finger is filled with blood!

Immediately I tilted my head and waited for it to stop bleeding. When it stopped, I went to the bathroom to wash my hands and make sure that there aren't any more blood on my nose or dripping out. Looking a little pale, I momentarily shut off in front of my desk dreaming that I was completing my work only to awaken within a minute to notice that I was dreaming. Lol!, But at least I now knew what to do and manage to perform my duties. Isn't it cool to let your dreams show you what you need to do? Haha!

The next day, my voice started to change I begin to develop more phlegm. Having difficulty breathing with my blocked nose, I was almost unable to perform any heavy thinking or coding. Eventually, I did but efficiency was really bad. Most of the time was spent staring at the screen trying to code while at the same time trying to breathe. On that night itself (thursday), my nose was so blocked that I was unable to catch much sleep as I was unable to breathe.

I woke up feeling really crappy and after my wiping myself dry with the towel after my bath, I tasted something salty on my tongue. I realised that something is dripping from my nose to my mouth. I ran to the mirror only to see a long trail of blood from my nose to my mouth and it was really scary. It almost looked like one of the movies where one of the guys get punched in the face and blood oozing out of the nose. I tooked the shower head and hosed it all off only to find that it keeps flowing back out. After about 3-4 times, it finally stopped and I sighed a sigh of relief.

I then quickly move to my computer and googled "nose bleed flu". To my relief, some of the sites said that there will be a higher chance for nose bleed when one is having flu. I then went to work after that feeling slightly more relieved.

Now after almost 5 days of sickness since wednesday, I no longer have the sore throat or the fever but now still have the running nose and blocked nose as well as cough which I foresee will take at least a week or 2 to cure. Thankfully there hasn't been anymore nose bleeds. Hopefully I will be cured completely much sooner and I'll be able to resume normal work duties.

Hello 2008!

First of all, I really do apologize for the lack of posts lately. Things have been rather busy for me and I've somehow lost the time allocated for blogging. Or it could simply be because my family now reads my blog and I'm just trying to keep things to myself. Hehe.

Anyway, it is a new year and guess what? I planned the eve of 2008 to go to church for the watchnight celebration but due to some persuasion, I changed my mind at the last minute and find myself in a cybercafe playing past 12 and did not even notice anything. It was only at 12.15 did we realize that we missed it. Darn!

Let's do a little recap of the events happened in 2007. I always thought that 2007 is a good year as it has the number 7 in it which is my favourite number and its of course the perfect number. Most of the things happened were good but there were some which was not so good things but then again; it’s a good learning experience. Here is the list of events/things that happened to me in 2007.

1) Started Working at March
2) Met a really good looking girl
3) Found a nice Young Adults CG to go to
4) Had increment on September
5) Heartbroken on November
6) 7 Year commitment ended on December 15th
7) Earned enough points to claim an iPod

Well of course in every new year, there must be new year resolutions. This reminds me of a MSN status of a friend on my MSN which reads "My new years resolution is to procrastinate it till next year". Although hilarious, most of us tend to follow that idea.

Looking ahead for 2008, I would like to see these things come true:
1) Get promoted at March.
2) Nominated for above and beyond
3) Get that 18months working experience and start getting the HotSkill perks as well as completion of ASDA
4) Expand my network
5) Improve my softskills
6) Save & Earn more money
7) Lose some weight
8) Find a girl?

That’s kinda it for now. I do hope that I have more time to write more in the coming days. But then again, if all I say is always "Things are good" or "it's fine", it will be kinda boring for you all as well as for me writing it. But of course I don't want to be in a bad situation or things all going bad for me. Hehe. Anyway, see ya next time :)

Merry Christmas!

Well it's the last holiday of the year and what have I been doing? Well, my brother was in KL for the weekend till Christmas, so on the early morning of 25th Dec, we went to Midvalley for brunch then to Garden for some shopping before seeing him off there. He went back to SG using the newly started bus company called Airebus.

When I came back, I was tired from all the walking and since I had little sleep, I fell to sleep almost immediately. Woke up when a friend of my parents came and I went upstairs to watch some videos. I managed to watch 2 episodes of Junkyard Wars; a series which I really love but not had the chance to watch it last time. After that, while waiting for dinner, I tried burning my 2 seasons of Heroes. OMG! I've wasted like 5 DVD+R's burning and still I now only have S1 E1-12 on one disc while the rest either burned unsuccessfully or had trouble reading them. I'm already thinking on whether I should return the Burner back to the distributor and get another one.

At night after dinner, I sat at home and watched another episode before I called Vincent asking him if there were any plans at night. He informed me that he will be attending Jason's open house and so I went not long after that. Gosh there was so much food! Most notably the chocolate fondue is amazing! Not to mention the apple crumble, the bread and butter pudding, the spaghetti, the cupcakes and the big turkey they have. Since I had dinner earlier, I was only able to nibble on the small and light food/snacks. After some chit chatting, I went home stuffed with the wonderful food there. Note to everyone: If you're invited to some makan in Jason's house, don't hesistate. You'll definitely find good food there :)

Updates - Destroyed My DVD Burner

Ok ok, I really apologise for the lack of updates here. There is just so many things to do with higher priorities than bloggine lately. Hehe. Ok it's a bad excuse. Sufficely to say, I've been rather busy. From my previous post, you all know that I've been through some tough times. It just sucked so much out of me. At times I just feel so crappy that the day just goes by without me doing anything. Thankfully, now it's not so tough anymore. I'm slowly regaining momentum and facing life's challenges as I used to be. There is now less days of "no mood larrr" but more of "let's try to finish task a/b/c in a set time". Its gonna take a very very long time to fully get over it I think.

Work has been very demanding lately, but not enough to complain that it sucks. I like the challenge and the strict timeline, but the only problem is that I get too much distractions in the process. As I'm about to start the task, either my MSN will pop up with someone wanting to chat with me or someoen will ask me some questions regarding som problems they encounter with the software/program that they're using/testing.

As a close friend of mine say, "our program is perfect, the problem must be with you". Unfortunately, it's not applicable in this context although there are some times when it does. Haha. Anyway, with the constant help I give to others, I find myself having little time for the task I need to complete. I feel really bad when I have to delay a couple of releases as I really wanted to complete any given task within 80-100% of the allocated time frame.

But all in all, that's not so bad consider that I've received a couple of recognition from my superiors. Over the couple of months, I've collected enough "internal performance points" to redeem myself an 8gb ipod nano (new generation model). It really seems like a nice gift to redeem but is this the lure to the mighty blue Apple? Will I soon be converted to an Apple supporter and end up buying Mac's and laugh at all Microsoft supporters? Hmm... I thought of redeeming it and giving it to someone else but I've not got anyone I'd like to bless cheerfully. Haha. Well maybe I'll save up for the other things. Who knows maybe they'll put up the iPhone for redemption when it hits Malaysia. Ooooo...

Besides work, I've just screwed up my DVD Burner. Thinking that I can utilise my extra DVDRW drive as an external drive. I bought a RM40 external usb-ide cable and connected to my DVDRW. It runs perfectly fine except for the occasional inability to detect the drive when I connect the usb cable. A couple of months back, I decided to keep my laptop on 24/7 and purchased some external fans for cool the laptop down. Using the power adapter, I extended it to connect 2 fans blowing to the laptop.

Unfortunately, the power adapter which came with the RM40 usb-ide cable, only has 3 pins (1,2,x,3) instead of the regular 4 pins (1,2,3,4). The fans uses only 2 pins (1,x,2,x). So I fabricated 3 wires to connect (1,2,x,3) to (1,x,2,3) and voila the fan + DVDRW works. However today, after failing to detect my DVDRW with the USB and after a couple of troubleshooting, I decided to look at my power connectors. When I finished tinkering with it, I switch on the power supply and "boom" the adapter blew up! Apparently, I've inverted it to (3,x,2,1) and boom the adapter fried. I quickly took my DVDRW to my desktop, hooked it up, the drive is detected in BIOS and Windows but I am unable to open/close the drive. Upon using the paperclip to open the tray, slot in a DVD, closed it manually, the drive did not spin up nor blink. Darn it! I just destroyed a perfectly good working DVDRW. Now I think I have to get a new one or just move my operations downstairs. Sigh... Gagh! I need to start burning stuff. I'm running out of hard disk space...

Haha. Sorry for the geek talk. I think I probably lost a couple of my readers here.

As a summary, things a ok-ish but it could have been better. Well, what is not meant to for me will not be mine, while what is meant for me will eventually be mine. Anyway happy birthday to me as today I'm now 22 years old.

On a sleepless Saturday night...

Here is the conversation I had recently when I couldn't sleep. Just wanted to post it so that I don't lose it.

A: Oi! why wake us up in the middle of the night... zzzz...
B: What's up? Something wrong?
Me: Cannot sleep lor.... sigh
B: What can I do for you?
A: Aiyoh, sure about her again...
Me: Haha. Yes...
B: What's up?
A: Need to guess meh?
Me: Haha.. Yea... just feel like crap
B: I thought you've moved on?
A: Told you already still don't want to follow.
B: Oi, give some help la...
A: Help what? He himself don't want to help
B: When love take controls, sometimes ppl don't think straight
Me: I have to agree with 'B'. I just wish that I can unwind everything. I've done quite a number of mistakes to her.
A: Remind me on who's the one being hurt. You or her?
B: Shut up la... Don't have to put salt on the wounds.
A: Wake UP la! It's not going to happen. Just move on
B: Aren't we supposed to help him achieve that?
Me: That would be greatly appreciated
B: We all make mistakes, if she'd forgiven you and you her, what's there to feel guilty
A: She's a bitch!
Me: SHUT UP! OMG! HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT! She's one of the most perfect girl compare to all that I've met.
A: Just trying to help you move on...
B: I think 'A' should keep quiet for a while. If you look from her point of view, she did nothing wrong. You simply misinterpreted some signals.
Me: Yea guess so. Guess I have to crash and burn this time. I've had enough of living my life in a dream. There is no such thing as happily ever after with some girl. The movies, series and TV all tell lies. There is no fallen star or some one true love waiting.
A: That's why they're called fiction. You really think you can find someone so right/perfect? And you really think that's her? Omg!
Me: Yea.
B: Just let time heal the pain
A: OMG! Time? The last one barely healed. If not, I still think its there. I know three is a good number, but I don't think you can take another man. Bzzzz. You wake me up for this?
B: Aiyah, what to do? You want to condemn him or help him?
A: Tell you what, since you mentioned about the close door policy last time, do just that. Shut the door to everyone. Push people back before they get a chance to hurt you.
B: Hey, how is that going to achieve anything?
A: Well you wouldn't get hurt.
Me: That's kinda true actually. It's not that hard to implement.
B: Don't listen to him. You've been saying that you did not have enough social life. Don't close up just over some small issue.
Me: If everytime I open up, my heart shatters into a billion pieces, no thank you.
A: Tsk tsk tsk. Look at him, collecting all the little pieces together barely able to make it back to one piece.
B: Well that's where we're supposed to help. Unfortunately, I don't have much experience and neither do you, 'A'.
A: I still think they are a waste of time. Focus on your other goals, like you said last time. House, car (s), technology, etc.
B: I used to remember family has a higher precedence than all that.
A: You have to say something to remind him of that right? Now who's helping?
Me: Lol, no need to argue la. I guess 'A' is right. I should pick myself up, do whatever I can and also not forgetting God to help me through this time of trouble.
B: That's the spirit! We'll be helping you too! :) And yea. Sorry to remind you of that, but I really don't think you should not do the close door policy. Alter it a bit so that it's not so closed but rather set guards at your emotions and heart so that its not so open.
Me: Wouldn't that just make me less transparent or less of myself? My idea is that if I don't meet anyone, they won't be hurt but for the people I meet, I open up completely and I expect them to do the same. Just that this time, I think I kinda overstepped my boundaries and expected a bit too much since we kinda barely know each other.
A: All the alarms was blazing. You just shut them off.
B: It won't make you any less transparent. But yea, you did shut the alarms.
Me: Haha yea. Should have paid more attention to that. Really thought it might work. Could have been the pressure from the commitment since it's ending really soon. Everyone has a gf or is getting married.
B: But you know true love waits.
A: Haha.. funny... isn't it time and tide waits for no man.
Me: Hmm.... interesting... but i don't think that works for love. I think that for love to work, it has to be 2 way. If she's never attracted to you, it's going to be difficult, if not impossible as it would seem that you'll be doing all you can to attract her and it will seem that you're trying to buy her love.
B: Ahh, now that you mention it, that's quite true.
Me: So in essence, if you have no looks, money or ambitions to attract someone or turn someone's head, it would probably not work. The only possible way is to have the inner beauty shining out so bright that others will get attracted to it. But it's hard as not many have that and that's why I think it's not going to work out for me.
B: Err... I don't agree the last part. You're way better than that!
A: Just focus on work la.
Me: Guess so... I guess it really ruined my confidence level.
B: All can be build up. Give it some time.
A: Talk about time, I want to sleep already. Omg...
Me: Haha. Me too! I don't want to waste the weekend away man.
B: Just don't think so much. We'll help you.
A: Please don't wake me up this late... zzz
Me: Thanks guys. Pray for me. I'll try not to disturb you. Haha!
B: No probs
Me: I'll post this conversation on the blog ok?
A: Ok.
B: Will it be offensive to some people? 'A' did say something bad about her.
A: I was merely helping him to move on. Ok, I don't mean it anyway.
Me: Well, I think it's ok. I didn't agree on your statement anyway.
B: Well, then I think its ok too. Go ahead.

If you've read the whole conversation, I'll have you know that the whole conversation was created in my head on Saturday night when I couldn't sleep. A and B are just a representation of my conscience.

Oh my, have I gone mad by talking to myself? Will I have a split personality like Gollum/Smeagol? I don't know. God, help me...

Anyway feel free to leave any comments. Just don't leave any destructive comments or say anything bad about her and stuff. Love is always uplifting never destroying.

Updates updates...

My apologies for the long hiatus. Suffice to say, I had quite a rough time over the couple of weeks since the last blog post and its safe to say that things are now getting slightly better.

If you know me well enough, you'll know what i've gone through over the couple of weeks. I really want to take this time to appreciate all of you with all the advice, guidance and encouragement.

Anyway, let's see how I've been doing lately. Well, work has been the same old same old. I’m doing quite well although I now have quite a challenging task to accomplish. I'll try to finish it either tomorrow or the day after tomorrow. I have to pick up and learn PL/SQL more in depth to complete this task. I hope I'll be able to do it successfully.

Apart from work, I recently watched Stardust and what an amazing movie it is. I usually don't like all the fantasy fantasy show with magic here and magic there but this one is just superb. A balance between fantasy, witty jokes and action and you get a blockbuster. The only problem was that when I was watching it, there weren’t any girl watching with me. It made my friends and I look a little bit 'gay'. But it's alright, the movie is still good! :)

The other interesting thing is that Heroes is now getting more and more interesting. I really recommend everyone to watch it. But if you haven't watch at least season 1, don't start on season 3. I will not put any spoiler here but do watch it. Only problem is that I have to wait weekly to watch it which is kind of annoying. I really hope that they put a proper season break and don't leave us all hanging on a story plot. :)

Anyway that's all I have for now. I hope that I will get better and overcome my problems soon. :) I wish you all the best to all of you in your work, studies, exams and relationships.

A Week to Forget

This whole week blows. People who know me would know that I'm facing a rather tough and challenging moment right now fighting 2 events of pain and disappointment. For the first event, there was post writen earlier about it but was not published due to the sensitivity of the post. Many of you have read it and yes I've decided not to post it till maybe sometime in the future. Thank you for all your inputs. I really appreciate it. Unfortunately, I don't really like hiding secrets or have stuff too personal/sensitive to post so, I will review all your reviews and post it at a later time. For now, i agree that its not appropriate.

Anyway, the second event happened on wednesday after CG where I discovered that my car got stolen! Over the past few days, I've been asking why did it get stolen. I've summed it up in a few reasons:

1) It looks quite new due to the fact that my mom maintains it well
2) There are many workshops in that area and they could use the car as spare parts
3) I didn't lock the steering with a steering lock

I've also wondered what could have prevented it:

1) If I were to change car with my dad's Wira before going CG
2) If I were to park a little closer to my CG leader's house
3) If I were to put on the steering lock
4) If I were to drive the car to mamak instead of taking my friend's car

If any of the steps were taken, it wouldn't happen and I wouldn't feel so bad and it won't be that inconvenient for my whole family now having to only use one car instead of 2. But what is done is done. All I can do now is let the police do what they do (hopefully) and get the car back intact and in pristine condition.

In summary, it has been a very bad week for me. Facing a major problem that has kept me up night after night and my mom's car getting stolen which also has kept me up at night. I just hope I can forget all these things and move on with life.

I would like to end with a hymm to remind myself of what a friend we have in jesus and also to take everything to the Lord in prayer.

What A Friend we Have In Jesus

What a Friend we have in Jesus, all our sins and griefs to bear.
What a privilege to carry, everything to God in Prayer.
O what peace we often forfeit, O what needless pain we bear,
All because we do not carry, everything to God in Prayer.

Have we trials and temptations? Is there trouble anywhere?
We should never be discouraged; take it to the Lord in prayer.
Can we find a friend so faithful, who will all our sorrows share?
Jesus knows our every weakness; take it to the Lord in prayer.

Are we weak and heavy laden, cumbered with a load of care?
Precious Savior, still our refuge, take it to the Lord in prayer.
Do thy friends despise, forsake thee? take it to the Lord in prayer;
in his arms He'll take and shield thee, thou wilt find a solace there.

My Perth Trip

This post will probably be the longest I've posted ever. Do note that it's quite heavy on the load out as there are quite a number of pictures uploaded. Do take the time to read through the blog and enjoy the pictures as it took much time to sort out the hundreds of pictures taken and upload them here. My apologies if the pictures don't turn out quite well. Most of the pictures are taken from my phone camera and some is from my Nikon Coolpix 5000 digital camera. In addition, this blog have been writen on my phone while I was in my trip so some tense in my sentence may be a little bit confusing.

9 October
I crossed the Singapore border in an Aeroline bus from 1Utama and as it weaves its way around Singapore, I suddenly felt a heavy burden on my heart. I'm not sure what it is as it could be that I'm missing my home, my work, my office mates, my friends or merely not being able to watch 2 episodes of Heroes in my time away.

I've found out that I'll be staying in Singapore for a night before embarking on my journey to Perth at 3.50PM the next day. After watching a couple of episodes of Air Crash Investigations days before the trip, I am very worried that I may not walk out of the trip alive thinking that the plane will crash. I even thought that I will write the final moments of the plane on my phone and seal it in an airtight bag if there were to be any disaster. For dinner, I was wondering if I should have contacted Eileen to meet up or not. In the end, I didn't as I'm with my family and I think I should spend more time with them.

At night, we had dinner in Sushi Tei in Raffle's City Plaza. I strongly recommend the golden roll there. It's really awesome with a layer of mango coating the rice with fried prawns in the middle. We went back to the hotel for a good night rest for the journey tomorrow.

10 October
I had a very restless night. Cramping 3 people on a single queen size bed meant that some of us didn't have much sleep with the constant blanket/comforter moving about on the bed. We again went to Raffle's City Plaza for brunch at Food Junction food court. The fried black carrot cake there is really delicious.

We left for the airport shortly and as I got on the plane I hoped that Perth is good or better than staying at home or else we would be wasting a load of cash and time for something we could see on Google Earth and Wikipedia.

My flight to Perth via Tiger Airways

I arrived at Perth at 9PM and the temperature was very cold. At night while we slept, the temperature dropped to 8 degrees and I couldn't get much sleep. I was saying that this is not what I have in mind for a holiday. 2 nights without much sleep is a bit too much!

11 October
We woke up and had breakfast before taking a walk around the neighbourhood with my uncle's dog. Later we went to King's Park for a little sightseeing. The flowers were amazingly beautiful! How I wish to share that sight with someone I like/care about. The beautiful flowers with the cool wind brushing through the skin and overlooking the city far away.

King's Park Memorial

Some blue wildflowers

Some red wildflowers

Some flowers in the Japanese Garden

More flowers in the Japanese Garden

An odd coloured looking tree

A fountain in the middle of King's Park

We left for AQWA (Aquarium of Western Australia) to see the marine life on display there. It is relatively similar to the one in Langkawi's but I get to see the seals and many other species not seen in Malaysia. I'll let the pictures do the talking.

Rockfish disguising itself

A shark!!! RUN!!!

A Seal

Jellyfishes

12 October
I woke up at about 9 and had breakfast. We left to Perth City after that. My uncle parked at King's Park and walked down the infamous Jacob's ladder to hitch a free bus ride to London Court. I bought a couple of souvenirs there and walked about in that area. We had lunch in a pancake restaurant in Cavillion's Place. After that, we went to a market and bought some nuts and strawberries.

Jacob's Ladder

After watching the sunset, we went to have dinner in Cincerello's which is famous for its Fish and Chips. We ordered a little bit too much as each dish comes with too much fries. In the end, we ate all the fish and seafood but left a load of fries as we're too full to consume it.

Watching the sunset on the beach

13 October
My uncle cooked bacons for breakfast and it was awesome. Had a chance to watch Heroes episode 3 as my cousin got the episode from a friend. YATTA!!! (Note: At this point onwards, I was very happy as I really wanted to watch Heroes)

We later went to Point Walter's for a short picnic there. It’s a place where there is a sort of beach on a river where people can come and have a picnic there. There is a 500 meters sand bank which extends from the land to the river. I walked on it and it took us about 30mins to walk to the end and come back.

The beach on a river

Some seagulls

Black Swans are only found in Perth

14 October
I went to Caversham Wildlife Part to view the Australian wildlife there. In there, we get to feed the kangaroos, touch the wombat as well as the koalas there. I'll let the pictures explain it. It is said that the Caversham Wildlife Park is better than the Perth Zoo itself.

A peacock with its wings extended

Feeding a kangaroo

A sleeping koala waiting to strike!

A Koala on top of a tree

At night we had an amazing dinner in Nicholson's Bar and Grill. They serve really good, cheap and big portion food. It was really delicious.

15 October
Today is quite a boring-ish day as we did mostly shopping for the whole day. We went to Harbourtown for shoppipng. Had lunch in a Japanese restaurant called Shimizu. The Chicken Teriyaki is not bad.

Later, we went to Garden City for more shopping and had tea in Miss Maud's. The pastry there is relatively good but nothing much to boast about. Unfortunately, I didn't get the chance to try out much stuff as they were closing when we're there.

16 October
We went fishing at Point Walter's and I was very excited as it was my first time getting my hands at fishing. We bought the bait, attached it to the rod and as my brother fling the rod; the hook went one side of the water and the bait another side of the water. We were laughing at the sight of that and after several tries, he got it working and later when I got my hands on it, I had many unsuccessful tries but eventually after the whole thing, I caught about 3 fishes. Unfortunately, they were all blowfish and we had to throw them back to the river.

We packed our bags and prepared to leave for Singapore. I learned that the plane will be arriving Singapore at 2.30 AM and that my bus to KL is at 10AM. We spent about 6 hours in the Singapore airport walking about, waiting for Mcdonald's breakfast and tried to sleep inside. We eventually reach KL at 3PM.

Overall, it was a good trip with a couple of small snags at the start, but in the end I said it was worthwhile.